On a BBW Facebook page, someone posted a photo of a lady in a BBW night club in a tight, short dress. The larger lady was showing some flesh, but radiated confidence. I should point out that the lady was NOT looking at the camera and as far as I can tell doesnt know the photo was taken, let alone posted by someone else on a Facebook group - which itself upset me!
However, it was actually the comments on this page that upset me the most! Ladies were SO quick to knock this other lady down. Comments about how trashy she looked, how her outfit was 'so wrong' and how she should have some self respect and wear something else. People were commenting that her outfit was inappropriate and that she should not go out in public like that, because it is not what people want to see!
My comments about how we dont dress for other people and how we should stand together as one fell on mostly deaf ears - and what a shame that is! Not only do I feel that we should all respect eachother anyway, but as a BBW group I found it upsetting that larger ladies would put down someone larger for wearing what they want.
Yes, the dress with tight and short. Yes, she showed off some flesh. Yes, it might not be something would I would wear - but who cares what they lady wears! What she does with her life and what her clothing choices, make no difference to me and my day! This lady was at a BBW night club, not a shopping trip to Asda, so let her wear what she wants to I say!
And then today - I posted this photo on Instagram!
I know, a photo of me in a pretty dress is not unusual, so you wouldn't think it would be such a big deal, but i think you'll see from these screen grabs that not everyone agrees! (I would usually block out a name, but seeing as these comments were made on a public forum (Instagram) and can be seen my anyone (my Instagram isn't private) I have chosen not to)
I have no problem at all with this lady and her life style choices, I don't even care if she looks at me and thinks I am disgusting - but what scares me is how quick she is to comment on a photo of someone she doesn't know just to try and bash them down?
The world is a big, bad scary place. The media tell us all the time that we're not good enough, that we should lose a dress size in two weeks or that we should get a bikini body for summer. All of this is thrown in our faces almost unavoidably - and I don't care, I am happy in my skin and I don't want to change. But why do ladies like the one above feel that they can comment on me and my lifestyle? Even if she doesn't understand me and my choices, I am just a stranger to her - what do I matter?
Ladies (and gentlemen), use your haters as your motivators! These people who want to rip you down and make you feel unworthy - DO NOT LET THEM! You are amazing and beautiful and don't let the world tell you otherwise. Spend time with your friends, cherish your family, buy pretty dresses whatever your size, eat too much, sleep too much, dance too much, slut drop until your thighs hurt but whatever you do, do not let them steal your shine - because you are worth more than you could even imagine!
Debz xx
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